CM Daisuke Airyu, reporting in for the week of 3/4-3/10, 2001
In the semi-grand tradition of FA Kessler, when he was CMDR of Tornado, I have chosen to resurrect his weekly "Grudge Match" section. My cohost is (until you can find me another) is PenPen. So without further ado...
THIS WEEK'S GRUDGE MATCH
The Trial of the Century
vs.
A Buick Century
PenPen: Trial of the Century gets tossed around very loosely by politicians and media types. It's been used to describe more trials than I can count.
Airyu: He can only count to three, for those of you who don't know. A Buick Century won't get tossed around by anything except a trebuchet. GO BUICK!!!
PenPen: The more recent "Trials of the Century" have had air-conditioned courtrooms...
Airyu: But no windows, no power door locks, and no bucket seats. As a luxury-ish automobile, the Buick Century has always come standard with air conditioning.
PenPen: The latest Trial of the Century has been given the JD Power & Associates "Trial of the Century" award, based on a poll of OJ Simpson's attorney team. The Buick can't boast any of that, and has never won any awards from JD Power.
Airyu: JD Power isn't a real person, and is not an actual business.
PenPen: Whereas the Buick Century is popular amongst crazy old ladies who wave their canes violently, the Trial of the Century is the choice for intellectuals, lawyers, media types, and such.
Airyu: But it had that murdering bastard OJ Simpson in it. The Buick Century has never had an OJ Simpson inside it, only the Ford Bronco and the Ford Crown Victoria. The Buick wins, hands-down.
Moral of the match : A Century today keeps the OJ away.
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FLEET NEWS
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EH FINISHES 4TH IN WOW
Wow. We done good. Give Dras Hempor and Lito Rendal pats on the back for going out there and KICKING ASS!!!
KAWOLSKI RELEASES NL #72 TO THE FLEET
Yay. Pretty pictures. Cool stories. And a banner with our favorite slogan on it. Download it at http://thunder.prohosting.com/~surefire/nl72.zip or http://www.absolutek.com/nl72.zip.
CA2:TAC SOUGHT
StarLion is looking for a faithful minion to slave over bug reports for hours, doing the grueling gruntwork of the administration of the Tactical Office. There, I think I've discouraged anyone from even thinking about going for it.
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CHAL NEWS
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LOCKE ON LEAVE
Tempest's CMDR is taking a nice week-and-a-half long trip to Virginia. Pray that I don't find him.
HICKS TO SCAMPER OFF SOMEWHERE
After only about a month or so of commanding Tornado, CoHo is about ready to step down. Send apps to... wait a second, I don't want any of you guys becoming freakish Tornado pilots!!! :P
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TYPHOON HAPPENINGS
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WE SMACKED EVERYONE IN THE FCHG RACE
With only Callista and Elwood seriously competing, we still managed to get second place! In addition, Callista got first, and Elwood got second in the individual race. Gratz to them both!
WE SMACKED EVERYONE ON THE CHAL LAST MONTH
WC General Darklord named us as Wing Commander's own for the month of February, because we (not me) utterly dominated the monthly BSF count. Way to go.
CALLISTA BECOMES A GLADIATOR
Yes, indeed. Our beloved Colonel has donned the cleavage-enhancing metal brassiere and other armor of the ancient female gladiator. *Cough cough* Seriously. She broke the 1000 FCHG points mark this week. Yay her.
SERPENTINE TO GO TO RESERVES
The latest in a series of position-dancing, which wasn't made official by the time of the report. LCM Serpentine has informed me of his decision to leave active duty. We wish him well.
ECR3 IN FULL SWING
We had a decent showing, five out of eight of us submitted for the first phase.The next phase is graphics. Don't rush yourself, so get started. Make it look cool, cause it'll make us look cool.
Arrivals:
MAJ Rich (Reserves) -------> FL 2
Departures:
CPT Quintus -----> Naval Corps
Internal Movement
LCM Richlet ------> FM 2-4
Awards:
COL Callista - Iron Star - Silver Wings
CM Elwood the Brave - Iron Star - Bronze Wings
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IF YOU'RE SLACKIN' AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS
(More commonly referred to as "orders")
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XWA LEAGUE
Come on!!! It's just one mission! Take off every Zig for great justice! I want to show my old CMDR up this time (MAJ Death of Avenger, btw). We all have XWA, so we should all be flying. The mission is FREE-XWA 24, and it is due in to me by Saturday, March 17.
EXERCISE CANTINA RUN III
The next phase has begun. Get doing whatever!
WING X HONOR GUARD
We are all to fly TC-TIE 167, probably one of the buggiest battles ever. Brave the Muurian Transports, and try to beat Callista's mission scores. If you need any pointers, don't hesitate, ask her! TFRs are due to me Tuesday, March 13.
STANDING ORDERS THAT REALLY AREN'T THAT STANDING, BUT PLEASE DO THEM, OKAY?!
-All pilots pass IWATS IIC/1 and M/1
-All FLs pass IIC/2 and M/2
-All FLs pass SM/2 with at least a 90% (yes, Rich, even you ;-) )
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ACTIVITY
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CMDR/CM Daisuke Airyu
-Submitted fiction for ECR3
-Made a uniform for Lee
-Wrote more fiction. Wanna see it sometime? Just ask!
FM/MAJ Brandon
-Submitted fiction for ECR3
-Flew TC-TIE 46, FREE-TIE 145, 146, and 152. There's no FREE-TIE 153, Branny.. so where'd ya get that tfr?
FM/LCM Talon Drear
-Submitted fiction for ECR3
FL/MAJ Rich
-Transferred in. Welcome aboard.
FM/LCM Frederik Greyson Junior
-Submitted FREE-XWA 15 for XWA League
-Submitted fiction for ECR3
FM/COL Callista
-Awarded IS-SW for 1st place in FCHG Race
-Flew TC-TIE 167 for Wing X Honor Guard, three mission high scores and a battle high score
-Submitted fiction for ECR3
-Flew TC-TIE 49, 51, 52, 54, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 64, 65, 67, 68, 69, 118, 120
FM/LCM Richlet
-Submitted image for Wing Commander's Own.
FL/CM Elwood the Brave
-Awarded IS-BW for 2nd place in FCHG Race
-Flew FREE-XWA 24 for XWA League
FM/LCM Serpentine
-Reported in, going to leave soon
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ROSTER
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TYPHOON SQUADRON: VIP Escort
NICKNAME: The Storm From Hell
BANNER: http://www.tiecorps.org/images/banners/typhoon.jpg
MOTTO: "We will fly the winds of DEATH!!"
MESSAGE BOARD: http://sitepowerup.com/mb/view.asp?boardid=123799
FLIGHT I - TIE DEFENDER
1) CM Daisuke Airyu (airyu@isdchallenge.org)
2) MAJ Brandon (brandon@isdchallenge.org)
3) LCM Talon Drear (wouterson@wanadoo.nl)
4) TBA
FLIGHT II - MISSILE BOAT
1) MAJ Rich (captainrich@surfnetinc.com)
2) LCM Frederik Greyson Junior (greyson@firemail.de)
3) COL Callista (callista@tiecorps.org)
4) LCM Richlet (richlet@yahoo.ca)
FLIGHT III - TIE ADVANCED
1) CM Elwood the Brave (markus.friebis@gmx.de)
2) LCM Serpentine (serpntine@aol.com)
3) TBA
4) TBA
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Respectfully submitted,
-Commander Airyu PIN #3552
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CMDR/CM Daisuke Airyu/Typhoon/Wing X/ISD Challenge {LGNR}
DOC/LT Daisuke Airyu/TC-BG/ISD Challenge {DOC}
Professor of IWATS Graphics (www.imperialacademy.org/graphics)
PCx2/ISMx6/MoI/LoC-PSx34/DFCx2/CoB/OV {IWATS-GFX-IIC/2-M/2-SM/2-TT}
"Wing X... just don't bend over." - LCM Yutzka Serovich