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SHAI's DEMOTION
PARTY FICTION
LC Pickled Yoda walked aimlessly down the corridors
of the ISD Grey Wolf, absently walking into walls and doors.
He was kinda down, kinda bummed on his recent demotion. He
walked around a corner and bumped straight into COmmander
Faliaj Shai. "So. Huh, huh. I heard you're stealing my
thing. With the walls. And the walking. Into. Huh? And with
that, Shai leaped on Yoda's back and started nawing at his
shriveled forehead, trying to take his thing back manually.
Yoda screamed and called for guards, and as they hauled Shai
away, still screaming obcenities strong enough to peel the
paint off of a new starship hull, he flashed back to the incident
that gained him the demotion.
***
"Hey, Yoda..." Followed by a muffled
chuckle. "Command is going to be uber bent when they
see the fighters." Another muffled chuckle. Yoda grinned.
He and the Monks had just painted all the TIE's aboard the
ship yellow, added smiley faces, and sliced into the ship
computer, changing the squadron names to Smiley Squadron's
1-6. He'd even had Joey paint a giant mural on the ISD's hull
which read, "Imperial Star Destroyer Greywolf. Home of
the TIE Smiley". Command was going to flip. He liked
it. He looked back to Vlad. "Yeah, the Wing Commander
is going to flip!" Vlad fixed him with a stare. "Ah
sithspawn. I'm the Wing Commander, aren't I?" He began
banging his head on the nearest TIE Smiley, causing dings
and pits to appear both in the fighter and his green forehead.
***
Gilad almost soiled his uniform when he saw his fighters.
He ran around, back and forth, trying to find the culprits
responsible for the fiasco. He was meditating in his office
when a chime came at the door. "Come in." Yoda came
in. "Sir, I pulled off the prank your probably fuming
about. I did it hoping to infuriate the Wing Commander. Forgetting
that I'm the Wing Commander. I think I've lost my edge for
pranks sir, and request permission to hang myself by the ear
hair from your belt buckle. Gilad whipped a bust of himself
at Yoda as the little green munchkin ran from his office.
***
"And that, children, is how Yoda was demoted to a tuber
peeler for a day or so." Shai looked up from the semicircle
of rocks facing him, each ainted with a yellow face. "Come
children, time for bed!" Gilad and Yoda watched the holocam
feed, trying not to laugh. "Well sir," said Yoda,
"I think they gave him a bit too much electricity for
trying to eat my head." "Oh well, at least he's
a funny vegetable. The crew will be amused, Broadcast it on
all ship frequencies." Gilad replied. "Yessir."
Said Yoda as he punched a few buttons on his datapad.
The End.
Emperor's Hammer Mind
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Emperor's Hammer Mind
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You know what? This may be the best wing report ever.
FOR THE EMPIRE!
Yod-the-Sod
In case you can't tell, this is me getting owned at Freelancer.
The view is from Kysar Xero's TIE (check out the uber cockpit
view!)
I wish I had my view, then you could see just how cool the
fireworks display that my ship (about to be blown up) is.
Oh well.
Click the picture for the full size version.
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