Note: Sorry for not being able to send this out sooner. I wrote it, but was unable to send it in at the time of writing due to service updates from my ISP. Thanks!
Pilot's Lounge
Lord Vader interviews potential Wing XV candidates:
Applicant 1: I'm the first applicant.
Vader: *Shuffles through the applications.*
Vader: I have nothing from you...
Applicant 1: I apologize! I didn't bring my application with me!
Vader: You're applying for a position, and you don't have an application?
Applicant 1: Erm... Yes...
Vader: You have failed me for the last time, Applicant! *Raises his arm*...
Applicant 1: Wait, my, Lord... I ca... *THUMP*.
Vader: Next!
Harkov: I'm the second applicant...
Vader: Hey, wait, don't I remember you from somewhere?
Harkov: *Shifts eyes*... No... Why?
Vader: Hey, wait just a minute! You're Admiral What's-his-face!
Harkov: HARKOV! I defect to the Rebellion, and you can't even remember my name?
Vader: Aha, so you ARE Harkov! *Raises his arm*...
Harkov: Gaaah!
Vader: Next!
Obi-Wan: I will have the position, Darth!
Vader: Your application is weak, old man!
Obi-Wan: If you deny my application, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.
Vader: *Slices through Obi-Wan with his lightsaber* ... Boring! Next!
Luke: I'll never take the position! *Jumps off a bridge*.
Since Lord Vader has killed a number of applicants, everyone is free to apply.
Lord Vader won't be conducting further interviews!
Letters from the Cardinal...
Episode III Titles?
1. Return of the Phantom Sith that Attack the Jedi
2. The Jar Jar Strikes Back (And is struck down!)
3. A Lost Hope
4. Secret Weapons of the Empire
5. Beware the Ides of March (Trouble in the Republic Senate!)
6. The Man in Black
7. Mon Mothma's: Rebellion on a Few Thousand Credits a Day
8. Dark Farce Rising
9. Rebels Killed My Parents: The Rise of the Empire
10. Aces Over Coruscant
11. The Quest for the Holy Death Star ("Palpatine, you must make an example in these dark times!" "Good idea, O Lord!")
12. Star Wars: Revolutions (Hey, wait a minute!)
13. The Madness of Lord Anakin
14. The Dispassion of the Emperor
15. The Creeping Fear (Supposedly, this is rumored to be a real possibility?)
News
- COL Nightmare was appointed as the new Avenger CMDR.
- Wing XV WC is open to applications. See emperorshammer.net for details.
- The monthly competition for WoW Iron Stars is once again in progress!
- Admiral Zaarin was tracked down and the ISD Glory destroyed. Zaarin attempted to escape in a Corvette, but the instability of the cloaking device onboard in hyperspace proved fatal. Long live the Empire!
- Got to love repeat news?
War Room
Week of War Incentive
Deadline: Monthly.
URL: http://www.emperorshammer.net/competitions/details.asp?ID=1403.
Description: Iron Stars for ASF WoW winners! Hurray!
Battlegroup Commander's Office
Congratulations to our new Avenger CMDR, COL Nightmare!
Wing XV WC is open for applications.
Make them good, we're looking for someone right for the Wing!
I realize that I did say I'd hold a competition for our mottoes and nicknames, but I've decided instead to hold a banner competition. More details on that soon.
I'm also planning on putting in another Training Office competition to get some extra medals for the recruiters amongst you!
I'll also be looking for mission designers and Multiplayer pilots shortly, but again, I'll mail out the details.
Picture of the Week
Aggressor Strike Force
ISD Grey Wolf - 56
ISD Intrepid - 38
ISD Vanguard - 34
Avenger Squadron - 5
In the service of the Dispassion of the Emperor,
Vice Admiral Khadgar
Aggressor Strike Force Battlegroup Commander
BGCOM-FOA-PROF/VA Khadgar/Aggressor Strike Force
GOE/GS/SSx6/BSx6/PCx8/ISMx16/MoT-2gh/IS-2BW-8BR-1SW-7SR-1GW-1GR/LoC-IS-CSx4-Rx3/CoL/CoB/LoAx32/OV-4E
[ARCN] {IWATS-AIM-ICQ-IIC/1/2/3-M/1/2-PHP-SM/2/3-TT-VBS-XTM/1}