Rear Admiral Jahan Kalar was just sitting down to enjoy some light reading (Expanded Tactical Manual on Heterogeneous Battle Groups and Convey Defense Scenarios) when the comm pinged.

"Yes?" Jahan was clearly annoyed by the interruption.

"Sir, a pirate leader named Admiral Zirkin is demanding to speak with you." The duty comm officer sounded a little worried.

"Demanding, eh? Well tell him I'm busy, but I have some lovely turbolasers he can speak to."

"Sir...?" Now the comm officer sounded uncertain.

"Lieutenant, I was joking, don't worry, I'll be there shortly." These kids today, no sense of humor.

The bridge of the Relentless was rather empty since the "day" shift was over and the night shift was just going on duty. Star Destroyers all operated on standard day cycles, and the day shift was the most busy since all the senior officers were on duty. Leaving the ship in the hands of a Major, even during the night, didn't seem like the best idea to Jahan, but *he* certainly wouldn't want this shift. Of course, as Commodore, Jahan supposed he was always on duty.

"Commodore on the bridge!" This particular Major was very enthusiastic and proper, and didn't appreciate Jahan's "As you were" before the Major's words were even out of his mouth.

"Alright Lieutenant, put it through." Jahan sat down in his Commodore's chair, widely estimated to cost nearly as much as the rest of the Star Destroyer, but, hey, Admirals needed a good place to sit, didn't they?

"This is Rear Admiral Jahan Kalar of the ISD Relentless, to who am I speaking?"

"This is Admiral Zirkin of the Independent Space Forces. You are in our territory and I order you to leave...now." Jahan figured Zirkin must have practiced his booming and menacing voice in front of the mirror every morning.

"You must be mistaken, this is EH space, and we're here to protect our interests in this region. When we are certain they are safe, we will leave. Not before." Jahan didn't practice booming and menacing, Imperial officers were supposed to be cool and in control. Jahan called it the "Thrawn Effect".

"I seem to outrank you, *Rear* Admiral, and if you know what is good for your pretty ship you'll leave before I lose my temper." Zirkin seemed to be well on his way there already, and Jahan couldn't resist another barb.

"You could call yourself Grand Admiral and it wouldn't make any difference. I have an Imperial Star Destroyer under my command. Your pretend 'rank' is not going to face down a Star Destroyer. Like I said before, we have a job to do here. It's nothing personal, but if I find you, I will kill you. Is that clear enough for you?"

"Don't say I didn't warn you. You'll regret the day you crossed us!" With an angry sounding beep, the comm cut off.

"I'm regretting it already." Jahan pinched the bridge of his nose, "I can feel the headache starting already. Who decided to give every moron in the galaxy his own 'space force'? Can we trace the signal?"

"No sir, he bounced it off too many receivers."

"Well, in that case, I'll get back to my reading, let me know if our 'Admiral' friend makes any encore performances"

Mumbling something about stupid pirates, Jahan walked back off the bridge.

SALUTE
Greetings and welcome to another Relentless Ship Report. It's been slow lately, but we have a few competitions starting up, so that should give you all something to do.

Situation Report
- Since we've had contact with an apparent pirate leader, alert status is increased and patrols are doubled trying to find these pirates main location.
- In the meantime, the Relentless is working on some battle drills. It's been a while since there have been any shipwide drills, and RA Kalar wanted to make sure people weren't getting rusty.
- A shuttle was damaged when two drunk crewmen decided to "have some fun". Fortunately tractor beams are faster than stupidity, and no one was injured, unless you count the surprised female lieutenant who was somewhat "out of uniform" in her quarters.

Relentless News
- Brad Tack has left the Relentless for the position of Ravager CMDR in Wing XX.
- Doyon has left the Relentless.
- The Portman competition from Hammer Squadron is complete, winner is Sunrider.
- The Jennifer Garner's Easter Gift comp is going on in Hammer.
- The Sword Ace comp is going on in...Sword (imagine that).
- My official email is now jahankalar@isdrelentless.org
- Darth Vader has been awarded an MoT -rh
- MAJ Loor has been awarded a PC for excellent performance.
- MAJ Powerslave has been awarded an ISM for excellent performance as well.
- CM Steve Sunrider has been awarded an IS-BR for winning the Portman comp.
- Drake is taking ownership of #ISD_Relentless...so be nice to him :)
- I've been having a few email problems relating to some hosting issues for the isdrelentless.org domain, hopefully they will be resolved soon, and if anyone sent me anything important over the last few days, please resend it.
- MAJ Loor has left the Relentless to command Inferno on the Challenge. He is a great officer, and the Challenge is lucky to have him.
- New pilot here on the Relentless, Tpyo (har har) has joined Crossbow. Welcome aboard!
- Tpyo has been promoted to Lieutenant and has shown good activity so far, why can't more SLs be like him?
- CPT Tiger has been awarded an IS-BR for winning the Hammer picture competition (the Jennifer Garner one).
- Run on started by Gunman on the Wing IX message board. Post and stuff.

Competitions
- Two new competitions coming up soon.

- One is a competition with Wing III. LC Strathaven (the Wing III WC) is submitting it to the TO, so expect some details as soon as she gives them to me, which should be soon. Now, as you all now, Wing III is my alma matter. I went from SL to GN there. I like LC Strathaven a lot, and Wing III is a fine group of people. That being said, I know you guys can beat them, and don't hold back on my account. I want us to win as much as anybody, and showing up my successor will be kind of fun. Plus we have a little wager to make it personal between us, so that's just one more incentive to win. :)

- In honor of finals week here at my college, I submitted a new competition called "Relentless Final Exams" to the TO. It will be a multi-part competition with squadrons getting "graded" for each event (or class if you prefer). The people with the highest grade for each event will get an IS-SW/R (depending on the event), and the squadron with the highest GPA at the end will be the winner (and get something nice of course). The TO approved it and it will start in about two weeks. I'm waiting for my own real life finals to be done before I run any competitions.

- So...be sure to dust off those joysticks and get ready for some competition.

Other Stuff
"Boxing is a lot like ballet. Except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other."

That's all for now...until next time, shoot straight and faster than they do.

Rear Admiral Jahan Kalar, Commodore of the ISD Relentless
COM/RA Jahan Kalar/ISD Relentless
GS/SS/BSx3/PCx2/ISMx2/MoI/IS-1BR-1SR/CoLx2/LoA/OV-3E
[GREN] {IWATS-AIM-ASP-CBX-IIC/1/2/3-M/1-SM/2-TT}