COM/AD Proton reporting for the SSSD Sovereign, flagship of the
Emperor's Hammer Strike Fleet.
SOVEREIGN AND FLEET NEWS AND NOTES
-- After a frenzied planning discussion this week, the organizers of the Sovereign's upcoming wargame presented a host of ideas and details to the War Officer, AD Pel. The admiral is working on the near-final outline for the Comp to End All Comps. This ship competition will include lots of combat on XWA, XvT, TIE, Jedi Knight II and Star Wars Galactic Battlegrounds.
-- Wing II is running a great-looking role-playing game. Depending on its success, COL Stele and I would like to take it ship-wide.
-- Ugly grudge match with lots of trash talk shaping up between Wing I and Omega Squadron.
-- Medals all have been awarded, finally, from the Sovereign Bombing Run Blowout.
-- Several pilots received Bronze Stars this week for having surpassed the threshhold of 1,000 FCHG points. A Silver Star award to COL Halcyon for exceeding 2,000 FCHG is pending.
-- Ah, you noticed I said COLONEL Halcyon. Congratulations to the Wing IV WC for his promotion!
-- A pilot transfer was rejected this week because it arose from illegal recruitment by a former Sovereign CMDR who transferred to another ship and tried to directly recruit squadron members to follow him. Commanders: If you leave the Sovereign, don't recruit pilots to follow you; incoming CMDRs and WCs, don't recruit from the ship you just left. Recruitment of active members is illegal!
FORCE STRENGTH
-- Give a big Sovereign welcome to these new or returning pilots:
None this week. In fact, we suffered a dip of eight pilots due to several AWOLs and a handful of transfers.
SSSD Sovereign [163]
Wing I [27]
Wing II [39]
Wing III [31]
Wing IV [35]
Wing V [30]
Omega Squadron [8]
SHIP COMPETITIONS
-- Sovereign Nighthawk Multiplayer Competition, each Friday night in
#ehcoc on IRC, 3 to 6 p.m. eastern time.
-- SBOTM: TIE-TC 97, XvT-TC 19, XWA-TC 26, send pilot files to CPT Koriel at _koriel@poczta.wp.pl and AD Proton at hullbreach@warpmail.net before Jan. 1.
SHIP COMMUNICATIONS
IRC channel: #SSSD_Sovereign
Message board:
http://boards.minos.net
The SSSD Sovereign Cantina Song:
http://www.minos.net/~proton/drink.html
COMMAND RANT OF THE WEEK
"So now I put it to you...are you gonna lie there, wallowing in defeat from the WC's Challenge and Wing II competitions, or are you going to defeat Omega Squadron and steal all their booze???" -Gn Gen Es'mith
" -NOTE TO CMDRs: CMDRs..... I seriously want some more substance in your Squadron reports. A couple are doing fine with their reports but the rest of you are seriously lacking in information. And for those who don't have much information, MAKE INFORMATION HAPPEN. Do you need to take your SM/2 or SM/3 tests again? This is your public lashing. Continue and you'll be shooting asteroids instead of Rebels for a living." -COL Stele Pellaeon
"You can blame me for a loss only if you guys fly.
The rest of you can suck eggs." -GN Gen
COMBAT DEBRIEFING OF THE WEEK
"It came from the fact that I saw all those XWA scores and realized
mine was piss poor.... Then it hit me... I forgot to set it on hard!
So I made a feeble attempt to save whatever flying reputation I had
by offering a fast e-mail covering my landing platform." -LC Freelancer
TRASH TALK OF THE WEEK
" What can I say except:
NUN RULES AGAIN!!! ... AS ALWAYS!" -MAJ Mayk Wolverine
"Now don't get too cocky, Wolvie... Nun may have beaten Mem this time, but we'll bounce back! The WC's Own will be ours, oh yes, it will be ours >:-)" -MAJ Yoman
"It would be my pleasure to annihilate my former flight leader's ascii!
Prepare to die Sub-lieutenant Janich!" -MAJ Talons Pryde
"Omega? finally... after it's done, I'll have beaten all the elite squads in comps :) *evil laughter*" -MAJ Eugene
"Hmm, yes. I think Free MEANT to say "expiremental" because the Wing I pilots will expire in great numbers, and you're mental if you disagree." -GN Compton
"Argon Viper? That youngin' is still in the EH? In Wing I now, nonetheless?? We're not facing a wing full of children, are we?" -COL Brian
"Now, Wing I, we have some visitors. Please show them the kind
courtesy we show everybody else, and I don't mean flip them the bird
;)
No, no, what we need to show them is the kind of courtesy where we
welcome them into the cantina, but never pay for their drinks. >:)
We need to show them the kind of courtesy that can be seen when they
end up grovelling for mercy at our flight boots.
In summary, Wing I, we need to show them how sociable we are, but
don't hide the fact that it's all business, and that we're going to
do a hostile takeover in this competition of anything with the logo
"OMEGA"!" -LC Freelancer
"The only reason you're Wing One is because that's as high as you can count.
And you have to take your pants off to be able to count that high.
Because you lost your other testicle in a training accident.
On a tricycle." -GN Compton
"I commend you, Omega... For being able to put a noun before a verb.
You see, Omega was named because its pilots do nothing but sit around
and "count their digits", (no matter how small they might be) while
everybody else was out saving the Empire. Wing I? Yeah, they stopped
counting there. No need to count any further. Anything else is just
superfluous.
Okay, I'll say it in small words, so Omega can understand with only 6
re-reads and a dictionary: We.... Will.... Defeat... You.... !...." -LC Freelancer
"I only have one question. When you guys fly, will you be bringing your
canes with you? Or does that clutter up the cockpit? Which is your
favorite food served to you through your straw? Thanks." -LC Mike
"Uh, your TIE does have a storage compartment. Duh.
Don't you remember the stories of the SPAM days when the TIE Corps' empty fighters were being used to ferry mystery meat across the galaxy?
Naturally, if we needed canes, they'd be stored in there, next to the
blaster pistol and cans of whup-ass." -COL Brian
"Us.....pay for the drinks!!! Sweet baby Vader, what kind of sadistic
monsters are we facing here!
By all means attempt your hostile takeover of all objects that bear the
glorious banner of 'Omega', just stay the hell away from my laundry
basket...oh yes, they've heard the pant-sniffing rumors as far away as Wing X gentlemen. Discretion, that's all I'm saying.
Oh, and good luck :P" -MAJ Brandon
"What sort of illicit pharmaceuticals are you on that you could possibly think that Omega would imbibe the swill that Wing I gets served? As mentioned in a recent SovNews, Omega has its own supply of various high quality alcoholic beverages. This is why we're not constantly trying to raid Proton's liquor cabinet. If you were drinking what we get to drink, L, S and D would have a lot less to do.
If you're nice, WE might invite YOU for a drink in Omega's lounge." -GN Compton
"Come, Come, Brandon, get your rumors straight! We REJECT pants, we
don't sniff 'em. And no way in hell am I going anywhere near your
clothes hamper >:P
'Least not without a gas mask of some sort." -LC Freelancer
" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
That vile acid reflux liquid you call "drink" isn't fit for a Hutt!
Boys, boys, boys! We're Wing I! We KNOW how to drink, and we know how
to get the top-notch booze! You Omega pilots get "free" booze,
because nobody in the fleet wants it!
We have such refined tastes that even WITH the good quality liquor,
we still strive for the best quality. Don't mistake our stealing of
Proton's booze to be a lack of alternative. No, we do it for the
really refined drink (and the sport, sometimes).
HAH! Drink your "free" swill. I'll be in Proton's Private Bar if you
need me." -LC Freelancer
"WIng I vs. Omega. lots of trash talking going around about this one.
Look forward to kicking their arses at the beginning of next year. I
think Compton's cane and oxygen tank will be a good addition to my trophey case.( Get it? Because they're OLD!)" -LC Mike
"Because some of us just like to stay in our comfy chairs, keep drinking
and watch the insults fly.
Wing I is going down..." -GN Devin
"Here at Wing I we feel one can still insult another without resulting
to the lower form of the insult, the dirty insult. Our scientists
have thus proven that we think on a higher level of thought than
Omega does. Thus Omegans go for the base level of insulting and
insinuation, and Wing I members apply brain power and achieve a
thoroughly satisfying and lasting sting to their Omegan opponents.
Wing I... Smart... Who'd'a thunk it?" -LC Freelancer
"You must forgive me. You see, in my zest to reply to Compton in a
manner befitting him I used an ironic twist. Where he made a
generalization about Wing I in his comment, I turned the tables
around and also made a generalization back at Omega. However, while
meant as an ironic response bear in mind it is a generalization, and
not in fact an accurate representation of all the data regarding the
different techniques the individuals in Omega participate in the
event of talking trash." -LC "Wonders how many old, feeble, omegans will understand that >:P" Freelancer
"Free, have you forgotten that Proton used to be Gallows of Omega? How do you think he learned where to procure the finest of alcohols?
Yes, he learned that while in Omega." -GN Compton
CANTINA COMMENTS
* zekkie returns his WC badge :P
"Looks like we've found our Gungan refugee, Jar Jar
Binks....he's hiding on Earth, writing English subtitles for bootleg copies of Fellowship of the Rings" -COL Inkwolf
"Now, excuse, please....some ox swarm over Hot Bottle...." -COL Inkwolf
"A lot of people who get to that kind of height end up looking like they are made up out broomsticks, eg. skinny arms/legs, but she just looks like someone hit her with an enlarging ray." -LC Mickk
* Topic is 'Ninj's weird. Just to state that once again. Not that it could go unnoticed... :P'
* Set by Tempest on Sat Dec 07 10:30:42
"ROFL. Dutch, ofcourse. We're the freaks of the world. :P" -LCM Dash
"Colons CLEANED? Not dissolved? They've grown back, then. Stele, I'm
disappointed that you have allowed this to happen in Wing II ;)" -AD Proton
"Also, Poke's got a copy of TTT (Tempest's Tailoring Tool or somesuch). If you want a uniform, e-mail him. I hereby appoint Poke our squadron tailor. Now, I've got some pants for you to let out. :P" -MAJ Josh Popelka
"Oh, that's interesting. Prae challenges us, then their CMDR quits. Yeesh. How are the kids putting it these days? Ah yes. PH33R." -GN Compton
"Oh, I thought maybe you would be concerned about all the ewoks, hutts,
jawas, gungans and other sentients who are slaughtered every time I
depress that button .... MUAHAHAHA ;)" -AD Proton
"No. The only problem I have with that is that everytime you destroy a planet you wipe out a limited source of delicious steaks." -GN Gen Es'mith
"He.... D'OH! Ewok steaks! CRAP! I forgot!
Okay, I'm going to need 2 volunteers to sneak past Stele's office and
steal some Ewok Steaks and Psi Brand BBQ Sauce (TM) from Wing II's
provisions lockers. Who's with me?!
Pshaw, man! Psaw! A CASE??? Noo.. I'm going to wipe Wing II out! I've
got a refridgerated cargo hold (with top level security measures)
rented in preparation for storing every last ewok steak in Wing II!
Let's see... Poison frogs, check. Lightsaber, check. Blaster pistol,
check. Blaster rifle, check. Last ditch scorpion grenade, check. I
think I'm set... Wish me luck boys and gals! I'm going over! (*pauses
dramatically at the door, then rushes out*)" -LC Freelancer
"::sighs as Freelancer slumps into a stupor::
Only Freelancer would kiss a poison arrow frog." -GN Gen Es'mith
"Yeah, yeah, sure, right.
I know you...you're a post pubescent teen hard at work at college, learning to make movies.
No doubt they'll be pornographic animated features." -GN Gen
"Free, in situations like this, you must take into account the fact that our Wing Commander is an old, sometimes perverted man. He'll reinterpret anything to be worse than anything us young snips can come up with (you do that one and I'll hurt you Gen... ;P)" -MAJ Argon
"Uh, Admiral, I have been working on schematics of a modifaction that would allow you to open three hyperpoints, and fire the laser through them.. One in front of the laser, one in front of the target, and one behind it..
It would allow you to hit Gen, and Gen alone, without doing any damage to anything around him..
*sees Gen's glare*
or not.." -LCM Pheonixus
Honestly, I think he learned that from Free and me while we were in Rho,
thankyaverymuch. They didn't call us colonless for nothin. I still have
mine in a bottle. I remember the day it was removed just like it was
yesterday..." -LC "colon-buster" Mike
"You know, he's right. It's easy to put the good stuff away, but unless you're a real drinker, you can't keep the crude stuff down ;)" -MAJ Argon "100 barrels of crude a day" Viper
"Halc is just in his usual delirius state of mind and
expects us to fly so don't mind him. :P" -MAJ Nurel Turr
"Good lord, I'm away from my computer for 5 days and I come back to trash-talking-spam-war-to-end-all-spam-wars. 178 messages (not including unsolicited porn advertisments). Whew, needed 2 bottles of Sierra Nevada just to get through all of them. Have enjoyed the lively banter and look forward to whatever comp we decide on. Nice to see life from my old wing." -LC Janich
"Did I mention that I went to Mecca over Thanksgiving?
(aka the Sierra Nevada brewery)" -GN Compton
"I wouldn't say I know where the cantina is.. No.. I mean it's
POSSIBLE I might not be able to make my way to the cantina...
Maybe... If I lost both my arms and my legs in some horrible
accident, and didn't have a wheelchair with one of those
mouth-controlled thingies, or nobody knew where I was to drag my
remains to the cantina for me... Just because I have the cantina
floor plan tattooed onto my upper bicep means nothing!
The fact that you can put my blood under a microscope and see SSSD
Sov floorplans laying out all and any route possible to the cantina
implies NOTHING about how much I drink!" -LC "could find his way to the cantina while dead" Freelancer
COM/AD Proton/SSSD Sovereign