|
The one where Airyu got tired from driving in the ice |
| THIS WEEK'S GRUDGE MATCH HAS BEEN REPLACED BY SOMETHING ENTIRELY DIFFERENT ALTOGETHER |
Lieutenant Colonel Airyu looked at his
datapad with a dissatisfied look on his face. He knew something was
the matter here. "Explain it again, Jer?"
"Well, it makes point-eight past-"
"No. Not that. What does it look
like?"
"Well... um... a mailbox."
"Why the hell would I want a giant flying mailbox that costs
me 9 million credits, and god knows how many more to fill up with
cheesecake!?"
"Just think of all the cheesecake delivering you could do
with it! We could extend and impose the Vanguard's annual bake sale on
random hapless planets! The financial possibilities are
limitless!"
"Well, I guess the only way to earn money is by throwing
your money at something else." Airyu pressed a button on the
datapad. For no readily apparent reason, the YT-2000 Iron Mantis III
disappeared, and was replaced by a much more unsightly Action IV
transport. "... Great. I shall call it... the Hungry
Hippo."
Long story short, I got a big cargo ship that is basically a
money factory. Not creative this week. Finals = death.
| WING XV/ISD VANGUARD NEWS |
:: The Holy Campaign to Register #wing_xv has succeeded! Come on into IRC to celebrate. Much thanks to Jer Stryker and Ibram Gaunt for their help. Props also to Paco, Khadgar, Gilad, and so on and so forth. Come drop by (on penalty of death?) whenever, someone's always on.
:: Apparently, LC Alec Qarni of Scorpion
is an IWATS professor as well, and his course hit 100 graduates, thus earning
him a Gold Star! Combobulations!
:: We got a new pilot, CPT Damon
Kast! Let's welcome him to Mantis Squadron and the
wing.
| STATISTICS |
|
|
CPT Frankie (Python) - 14
LCM Ice Man (Echo) - 11
CM Ibram Gaunt (Mantis) - 10
LC Alec Qarni (Scorpion) - 7
|
|
None. Why isn't anyone flying
multiplayer?! :p
|
|
|
|
|
|
GS - LC Alec
Qarni
|
| ||
| CPT Damon Kast | Reserves | Mantis 2-2 |
|
| ||
|
| ||
1 in! w00t!
| COMPETITIONS |
Fleet Wide
:: (XO) - Webmail Skin - http://www.emperorshammer.net/competitions/details.asp?ID=1507
:: (XO) - Banner Design - http://www.emperorshammer.net/competitions/details.asp?ID=1508
:: (FO) - TIE Corps Holiday Jingle - http://www.emperorshammer.net/competitions/details.asp?ID=1654
:: (FO) - TIE Corps Holiday Bash - http://www.emperorshammer.net/competitions/details.asp?ID=1655
:: (TAC) -
Fill Mike's Hole - Send your entry for TIE-TC 43 to Mike and his CA
:: (RO) - Recon Office Banner Comp - Contact AD Joe (noon001@aol.com) for more information
:: TIE Tattoo Search Competition - Send the best GFX of the whole Emperors Secret Order tattoo (from TIE Fighter) to kyterrak@aol.com.
ASF Wide
Expect some new ones once Khadgar's successor is in place.
:: (RO) - Recon Office Banner Comp - Contact AD Joe (noon001@aol.com) for more information
:: TIE Tattoo Search Competition - Send the best GFX of the whole Emperors Secret Order tattoo (from TIE Fighter) to kyterrak@aol.com.
ASF Wide
Expect some new ones once Khadgar's successor is in place.
Run of
the Mill awards have been announced, with yours truly sweeping the Caption
competitions, and placing second in a flying
division.
Wing Wide
Wing Wide
:: New Wing Banner - Currently, we share our logo
with the ship. This sucks, and needs to change. I know we have some
wicked graphic artists out there, so go and do it! IS-SR & BR will be
awarded to the top two entries. The winner's entry will become the
official Wing banner effective January 1st!
:: Raid-N-Trade - For those of you with
Freeworlds... we have two divisions, raiding and trading! Whoever has the
most kills and missions for the month of December wins the Raiding Division, and
whoever earns the most money in December wins the Trading Division. IS-SWs
and BWs will be awarded.
:: Strong Bad Reports #1 - Go to www.homestarrunner.com
and look around a bit. Get a good feel for the Strong Bad voice, and go
record a Strong Bad version of any TIE Corps report you can find. The best
entry gets an IS-SR, second-best gets an IS-BR.
:: Strong Bad Reports #2 - For those of you
without microphones, you can still pull the strings... Write a "WC Bad
Email" (just a stupid question or something, preferrably with bad spelling), and
I will answer it in my best Strong Bad voice, which is better than your
Strong Bad voice. If, of course, it doesn't suck. All emails I use
will be awarded IS-BRs, and get attached to certain of my Wing
reports.
:: Rating Races - FCHG and Combat rating races, except I actually keep track of them
www.ehtiecorps.org/competitions/details.asp?ID=1587
:: Deck the Mantis - Write something about my personal ship, the YT-1138 Iron Mantis II.
www.ehtiecorps.org/competitions/details.asp?ID=1637
:: Furnish
My Office - No Star Destroyer is complete without a good website. Since I'm
loaded down with coursework and don't quite have the time to dedicate to
building a website from scratch, I'm opening up the task to any Wing pilot with
the know-how and time. This isn't really a competition, but it's something you
guys need to do. And be rewarded handsomely.
| NUMBERS |
Frag Officers (Like flag officers, but with more kills): 1
Echo (When a duck quacks, it doesn't have one): 6
Scorpion (If you find one of them in your sleeping bag, be afraid): 6
Mantis (If they're praying, it's a crime to kill them. But don't worry, ours are all atheists): 6
Wasp (Like a hornet, except not really): CLOSED
Hornet (Like a wasp, except not at all): 7
Python (They're not funny, because nobody is Monty): 7
TOTAL (a larger number, that is often a combination of several smaller numbers): 33
| THE WEEKLY ACKBAR |
KuronekoSama 42:
hope you're enjoying my Jockstrap of Valor
jdf1984: we lost, Echo got that
KuronekoSama 42: (didn't see it in your signature line) :p
KuronekoSama 42: no no
KuronekoSama 42: the loser gets the jockstrap ;-)
jdf1984: :P hmmm. i coulda swore that was the trophy for the winner. 8-)
KuronekoSama 42: but why would the winner want a dirty jockstrap?
KuronekoSama 42: besides, i'm your boss, it's my call ;-)
jdf1984: ahhh, i see. it wasnt dirty, though. it was to be a symbol of honor, to hang from your TIE solar panel
jdf1984: lol
KuronekoSama 42: hahaha
KuronekoSama 42: nope...
KuronekoSama 42: that's more like something you'd put in a warhead launcher to fire at a rebel ship ;p
jdf1984: my fictitious trophy is being entirely mis-interpreted :P
KuronekoSama 42: welcome to wing xv, jdf ;P
jdf1984: :P been here awhile
KuronekoSama 42: the home of dramatic misinterpretation
KuronekoSama 42: any trophy or acronym will be horrendously butchered
KuronekoSama 42: more fun that way
jdf1984: :P is this a new standard procedure for the wing? or just under your tyrranical reign?
KuronekoSama 42: ... yes
KuronekoSama 42: very yes.
KuronekoSama 42: do you have any ideas for the next epic competition for my underwear?
jdf1984: lol, to the latter part?
KuronekoSama 42: i don't know. what was the question?
KuronekoSama 42: i figured it'd just be dramatic and evil to say what i did.
jdf1984: KuronekoSama 42: any trophy or acronym will be horrendously butchered
jdf1984: :P is this a new standard procedure for the wing? or just under your tyrranical reign?
KuronekoSama 42: bah!
KuronekoSama 42: this is how it is.
KuronekoSama 42: this is how it shall be
KuronekoSama 42: so it has been proclaimed
jdf1984: gotcha
jdf1984: better include that in your next Wing Report
KuronekoSama 42: mayhaps.
KuronekoSama 42: if i don't get a better bid from my other corporate sponsors
jdf1984: you mean Jockstraps, Inc. isnt good enough for you? we provide support, damnit!
KuronekoSama 42: ok fine, you win.
jdf1984: lol
jdf1984: we lost, Echo got that
KuronekoSama 42: (didn't see it in your signature line) :p
KuronekoSama 42: no no
KuronekoSama 42: the loser gets the jockstrap ;-)
jdf1984: :P hmmm. i coulda swore that was the trophy for the winner. 8-)
KuronekoSama 42: but why would the winner want a dirty jockstrap?
KuronekoSama 42: besides, i'm your boss, it's my call ;-)
jdf1984: ahhh, i see. it wasnt dirty, though. it was to be a symbol of honor, to hang from your TIE solar panel
jdf1984: lol
KuronekoSama 42: hahaha
KuronekoSama 42: nope...
KuronekoSama 42: that's more like something you'd put in a warhead launcher to fire at a rebel ship ;p
jdf1984: my fictitious trophy is being entirely mis-interpreted :P
KuronekoSama 42: welcome to wing xv, jdf ;P
jdf1984: :P been here awhile
KuronekoSama 42: the home of dramatic misinterpretation
KuronekoSama 42: any trophy or acronym will be horrendously butchered
KuronekoSama 42: more fun that way
jdf1984: :P is this a new standard procedure for the wing? or just under your tyrranical reign?
KuronekoSama 42: ... yes
KuronekoSama 42: very yes.
KuronekoSama 42: do you have any ideas for the next epic competition for my underwear?
jdf1984: lol, to the latter part?
KuronekoSama 42: i don't know. what was the question?
KuronekoSama 42: i figured it'd just be dramatic and evil to say what i did.
jdf1984: KuronekoSama 42: any trophy or acronym will be horrendously butchered
jdf1984: :P is this a new standard procedure for the wing? or just under your tyrranical reign?
KuronekoSama 42: bah!
KuronekoSama 42: this is how it is.
KuronekoSama 42: this is how it shall be
KuronekoSama 42: so it has been proclaimed
jdf1984: gotcha
jdf1984: better include that in your next Wing Report
KuronekoSama 42: mayhaps.
KuronekoSama 42: if i don't get a better bid from my other corporate sponsors
jdf1984: you mean Jockstraps, Inc. isnt good enough for you? we provide support, damnit!
KuronekoSama 42: ok fine, you win.
jdf1984: lol
| IT'S OVER |
Sorry about the lack of presence this week,
kids. It was the end of the semester, which meant absolute hell for
me. I was back and forth between home and school, and on a dialup
connection for the better part of the week. I was also just a little bit
engrossed in preparing for these exams. Next week might not be any better,
as I'm heading out to Ohio for Christmas with the girlfriend's
family.
So I guess... this is the end of the
functional year. Have fun over the holidays, and watch out for the egg
nog. Any submissions I get will take a little longer than usual to be
processed, but don't worry about it. JUST HAVE FUN DOING WHATEVER YOU
DO!
In the service of the end of the
year,
LC Daisuke Airyu
WC-PROF/LC Daisuke Airyu/Wing XV/ISD
Vanguard
Professor of IWATS-GFX
GSx2/BSx4/PCx5/ISMx9/MoI-BC/MoT-2rh/IS-5BW-4BR-3SW-7SR-2GW-6GR/LoC-CSx8-Rx1/DFC-Rx2/CoL/CoB/LoA/OV-4E
[GLDR]
{IWATS-AIM-AMP-ASP-CBX-CSS-FLA-FW-FWT-FZ-GFX-HIST-IBX-ICQ-IIC/1/2-JS-LIN-M/1/2-MP-MS-SM/2/3-TACS-TLN-TM/1-TT-VBS-WM-WPN-XML-XTT}
ISD Vanguard Top Dog 2004
CMDR of Echo Squadron,
Vanguard Top Dogs 2004
CMDR of Echo Squadron, Wing Commander's Own,
September 2004
ASF Battlegroup Commander's Legate, August
2004
November 2004 ASF Lord High Captioneer
Former Ship Doctor, ISD Challenge,
FMC