Wing XIII Report 37, September 21 2004. Document limited to ASF Internal Use Only LOCATION CLASSIFIED

 

Joey is back. *sigh*

This is going to be short on important information (like Avenger Reports) but you can always read COM reports for medals and activity. Grats to Hex Ra Kun on being the new Crusader Commander. I'm also pleased to see that we're filling Flight Leader spots in. Keep it up.

The refreshing smell of BSFs has once again struck my inbox. You know Keiran is back when you have a dozen BSFs in the mail.

Good work to participants in the pop quiz.

By the way, we're apparently going to fight some dudes soon in Imperial Storm, so like... warm up your flying ness

==FUNNIES==

With regards to recent posting on the TC news about "appropriate" medal awarding, the GWSOoM decided to put the OPS to the test to see whether he really approves only proper medals.

The following was recommended for Astatine.

Sector Admiral Astatine hasn't been awarded a merit medal for over three years now. This is a great shame and clearly shows a lack of love from officers who should know better. I therefore recommend that Sector Admiral Astatine be awarded the Incredibly Special Medal for duties that include, but are not limited to: - saying "..." and "zzz" a lot - going above and beyond in research for the "Portman Project" - protecting our email addresses from naughty people - rebuilding the TIE Corps database from scratch using only two paddle pop sticks and some bubblegum

Later on, we made sure that our fine OPS understood the motivation behind this classic antic.

Oh Foley Who Art Teh Pwner of All, Mere words cannot make up for the terrible burden that I was to your Holiness recently. I feel that only subservient prostration will spare me from your Unholy Wrath of ISMness. So here I am, your servent for all tasks and needs, from cleaning the blood off your floor from cleaning the blood off your walls. Please Oh Knowing Pwner of the Prank Reccommendation, spare my life. I am but a lowly wretch, a Wing Commander. I cannot match in any way your Divinenessness and promise on my unworthy life never to darken your doorway again. Cheers, WC/COL Pickled Yoda. P.S. In all seriousness, I sincerely apologise for my light hearted antics. I assure you that I never intended to 'suck up' to Ast and subsequent ideas of a "Pretty Crescent" for Ronin and my petition to have you promoted to a new position of "Medal Admiral" have been well and truely forgotten.

Not bad, I thought.

==FICTION==

Because I can, I'm forcing some fiction I wrote down your throats. Enjoy or die a painful death.

Note that I don't actually know whether Kysar is using this as part of his character, and that I just used his name randomly. I wrote it for school. Heh.

Baptism of Fire

Pickled Yoda

 

Kysar Xero let a ruthless grin grow on his face as he saw the flaming X-Wing enter his targeting reticle. He would wait until the X-Wing was dead center in his sights, a perfect and clean kill. His prey juked and weaved to no avail.

“Prepare to die, Rebel scum” he muttered under his breath. With his finger getting twitchy, he began to fire his green lasers of death, watching as his target…

BZZZP! BZZZP! BZZZP!

Kysar Xero opened one sleepy eye and fumbled for his alarm clock He whacked the button that should have given him peace three times before he looked at the clock. 6:43AM. His clock alarm shouldn’t have gone off until 7:30AM . Groggily, he sat up and realized what the noise was – the siren that warned of danger. His home, an old space platform, was under attack.

The next ten minutes were a blur in his memory, but Kysar found that he was dressed and had run to the hangar where his prize possession, a Z-95 Headhunter. He laughed as he recalled his dream. ‘Not quite as good as the TIEs I want to fly.’ Kysar thought, ‘but it’s a good ship.’

“Warning, hostile ships have entered the area.” The intercom’s bland voice rang out and shook Kysar from his reminiscing. He had a job to do… he had to protect his family and the station. Those damn mercenaries the station employed as guards were probably still sleeping.

bzzp. bzzp. bzzp.

No alarm, but his comlink this time. Kysar glanced at the small screen, which revealed that his father was making the call.

“Kysar? Where are you?”

“I’m at my ship”

“Your ship?? Go to the transport! We have to leave now!”

“But what about my ship? And what about those hostiles? The transport doesn’t have guns!”

“You’ll have to leave your ship. We can out run the pirates”

“Out-run them? The transport couldn’t out run a tug, let alone a pirate fighter”

“What else can we do? It’s our only chance!”

“I can fly cover!”

“You’re only sixteen Kysar!”

“So what? I can fly”

“It’s not one of your simulator practices. Get to the damn transport!”

“I can do this, Dad!”

There was a long pause as Kysar’s father began to realize something. “I can’t stop you, can I?”

Kysar grinned to himself. “No. Launch as soon as you can, I’ll cover you until you can make the jump to light speed.”

“Force be with you, son”

Kysar turned the comlink off and closed his eyes. ‘Force be with me. I’ll need it all’. He then vaulted into his open cockpit and checked his systems. ‘All green, but do I need fuel? Who can top me up, there’s no mechanics around? Sithspit!’ At that moment Kysar noticed the fuel gauge was reading nearly full and berated himself for getting so panicky. ‘Calm. Be calm! Think logically!I need to know what’s out there.’ He opened a channel to the base command

“Control, this is Kysar Xero, what’s out there?”

“Kysar? Get off the channel kid! This is serious!”

“So am I. Where are your frigging guards? I don’t see them, so why don’t you tell someone with guns what’s going on?”

“Bloody hell! Alright. We see an old Strike Cruiser out there; with six Y-Wings flying cover. ETA five minutes. You’re the only pilot to have contacted me, so you’re on your own for now.”

“Bugger! Thanks!”

Kysar powered on his ship and launched, and was circling the platform within 30 seconds. He checked his sensors. The six Y-Wings were coming ever closer to him. Ungainly though they were, lasers were lasers. Six of them could easily over come his nimbler fighter. He thought about what he knew of Y-Wings from the simulator. ‘Primarily a bomber, though often used by pirates for dogfights as well. Heavy armour , two lasers, two ion cannons and two missile launchers. Sluggish to turn but deadly against large or slow targets ’ Large targets like the platform. Slow targets like his family’s transport.

ETA three minutes. Comlink buzzing. His father. “We’re launching now”

ETA two minutes. Two Y-Wings heading straight on, the other two pairs broke off to the left and right. ‘Two on one is much better than six on one’

ETA one minute. Test fire the guns. Check recharge settings. Thirty Seconds. ’For my family!’

Kysar saw the targeting reticle indicate the enemy was in range. He fired on the leading Y-Wing for several seconds, then dove and twisted his fighter around to avoid the counter fire. Pulling back on his joystick, he came up behind the second Y-Wing and pumped laser bolts into it until the shields collapsed. The next volley of shots went straight into the cockpit, killing the pilot instantly. ‘Lucky shot. Maybe this won’t be too bad after all.’

Suddenly red light flared in his eyes and Kysar realized that the other Y-Wing had turned at last. ‘Shields down to twenty percent! Can’t take much more of that firepower!’ Kysar immediately hit full speed and tried to get behind the bomber, but it soon became apparent to him that this pilot was much better than the other one. ‘And it was going so well too’. Soon Kysar and the pirate were locked in a tight battle, each struggling for the upper hand. Just when he felt that he was getting close to a kill, he heard a distress call.

“Help! Pirates are attacking us! Please send help” A female voice, clearly scared.

’No kidding, lady’ Thought Kysar. ‘Wait a second…that’s my mother! Where are they?’

Kysar glanced at his sensors. The four Y-Wings that had ignored him had gone straight on to the platform. Or what had been the platform – all he could pick up was a heap of debris. Now they appeared to be swarming a transport. His family’s transport. He had to go and help them.

“Aaaargh”

Too late. In horror, Kysar watched as his family was blown away by pirates for nothing more than target practice. He felt something powerful building inside of him – a feeling of immense energy and power. Suddenly he was an enraged demon, and he yelled out in anguish. Vengeance. Punishment. Death. With his teeth barred, he turned on the pirates with a fury, no longer caring whether he lived or died – only that he exacted some revenge.

By the time the Imperial Star Destroyer Grey Wolf had arrived and chased off the Strike Cruiser, all that was left in the area was Kysar and his Z-95 Headhunter.

“Headhunter, please come aboard. We’d like to debrief you about the attack.”

Kysar, barely aware of what he was doing and in a trance like state, replied “Okay… but tractor me in… I don’t feel all that good.”

“Roger that. We’ll have a medical team standing by.”

“You … do that.” Slurred Kysar as he passed out.

 

A day later, Kysar woke up in unfamiliar surrounds. He looked around and saw a smartly dressed man standing next to the bed.

“What….Where am I?”

The man smiled faintly. “You’re on the Star Destroyer Grey Wolf. Pirates attacked you…do you remember?”

“Flying my headhunter….Y-Wings…my family! Where is my family?”

“I’m sorry to report that your family died in the attack.”

“Nooo!”

“I’m afraid so. But if I may get straight to the point, I am Gilad Pelleaeon, commodore of this fine ship. I want you as one of my pilots.”

“But…aren’t I too young?”

“Perhaps. But the Empire always needs good pilots, and after looking at your flight cam, I know you’re a great pilot. You got all six Y-Wings with minimal damage to your ship. I know you must want revenge, and you can get that with us. We’ve been assigned to hunt down pirates; especially the ones we believe attacked you.”

Kysar thought about it and smiled for the first time in what seemed like an eternity. “I accept.” Kysar Xero, the Empire’s newest recruit, swore from that moment on that nothing would get between him and the pursuit of the pirates who killed his family. ‘I will have my vengeance’