Wing IX Report #17 From the desk of Lieutenant Colonel Rejili Holthaus...

FLEET NEWS
------------------

1. WEEKLY NEWS ITEM OF THE WEEK THAT'S COMPLETELY INCONSEQUENTIAL AND UNIMPORTANT BUT IT HELPS FILL UP A REPORT
Have to eat my works from last week... the FO has already appointed a new CA:FO in the form of FA Sarin. One more needless CS to spam my email :P Anyway...

2. TOKEN TACTICAL OFFICE NEWS ITEM OF THE WEEK TO MAKE IT LOOK LIKE WE ACTUALLY CARE ABOUT THEM
If you've always wondered what a TMD is, but were too embarrased to ask, this section is for you!

-The tactical mission designer (TMD) is a new TAC position.
-They will be required to build battles and missions, on demand!
-They will usually work with the plotline compendium.
-They are required to have Mission creation knowledge!
-And yes, they'll be allowed to do personal projects.

Too bad no one cares :'( Pitty party for the TAC.

3. ELITE NEWS WHICH IS PROBABLY INNAPROPRIATE FOR THIS TYPE OF REPORT BUT IS INCLUDED ANYWAY
Hero Radio on HARA was on this week for the first time in a couple weeks. Of course, I was too busy listening to actually give the Wing news... thanks to COL La'an for filling in :P

WING NEWS
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1. COM APPOINTED
La'an = Out, Oldham = In. He's our new boss, so... do whatever he says. Unless he says something like 'get under my desk', at which point you should probably let Bubba know...

2. WING IX REORGANIZATION
Dagger closure is seemingly even more immenent, I just need to fix up the new roster a bit and submit the plans to our new COM for approval. Dagger pilots who have a preference for where they want to be moved should let me know immeadiately.

3. NEW SHIELD CMDR
With Fox once again boozing in the RSV's, I've asked COL La'an to come back and teach you crab infested scurvy dogs what it means to be a real squadron. And while you're at it, shine my T/I... with your toothbrush... NOW! :)

4. WING IX ROULET COMP
In the spirit of Las Vegas, with it's ample supply of booze and hookers, I've started a little game of chance I call Wing IX Roulet. Losers die :P Actually no. You fly missions. I pick number. If my number = your score, you win an IS-BR for doing NOTHING!! Yeah something for nothing! Except flying of course...

5. FREE WEB HOSTING
Mell has agreed to give all our squadrons free hosting on tcbg.net. CMDRs who have not yet contacted me about this, please do so. Also, remember that you may have to bug Mell a little bit, he's been kinda slow to reply to things lately :P

6. RANT COMP
I am out of morale. I'm going to resubmit this comp, but this time you have to provide me 4 short pieces, and its worth an IS-SR. They don't have to be good, or even funny, but they should be your original work.

7. **RECRUITMENT DRIVE** - #1 PRIORITY
Our numbers are lower than they have ben since our last recruitment drive, so it's about time for another. We realy need to get some new blood in here, go for rl and reservists, stay away from cadets. I will be VERY generously awarding everyone who brings in recruits.

8. WEEKLY ACTIVITY
I want to see stuff I can submit to the EH newsletter to promote Wing IX. Each submission get's you a medal in and of itself, plus I'll offer ISM/PC if you send me enough stuff to merit it. This is something easy to do, the newsletter will publish just about anything, so let's get out there and make ourselves known.


9. ATTENTION FMs AND FLs!
I noticed on this round of MSEs that some pilots didn't have all their activity accounted for. Your CMDR keeps track of activity, but you can't expect them to know every little thing you do. When I start saying it's MSE time, I want you guys to send a report of your activity for the month to your CMDRs. This is more for you then for me, because if you tell us things that you've done which we haven't recorded, you're more likely to get better medals and rewards.

10. CHANGE OF EMAIL
I'm still getting some emails (mostly from the webgroup, which I'm unable to fix right now :P) to my hotmail account. Please update your records to my new address, NHolthaus@Gmail.com , not too much different, just where it counts ;P

11. DRINK OF THE WEEK
Straight from the bar of the Stardrifter Lounge, and personally tested and approved by Lieutenant Colonel Rejili Holthaus, this week's serving suggestion ...

Sex with Jennifer

1.5 oz Coconut Rum
1 oz Triple Sec
1.5 oz Vodka
1 dash Grenadine

Instructions: Top of with pineapple juice, mix in a glass, and drink fast ;)



THE WING IX MORALE OFFICE
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A Rant from the Desk of Colonel Steve the Cricket Bat ...

It seems that no random fic can escape COL Steve and the morale office gestapo. This one is from LC Mosh, for your reading pleasure...

::Holonet Transmission:: doc. 516482556489
-=Form:WSS23a=- Incident Report Auto Transcription
Droid: MP23164D4582GYBN/3
Officer ID: 11673 Copperdog

[Describe the incident in your own words]

Well, I was cleaning the floor of 5 Deck [ISD II Relentless Deep Storage Level] like I'd been instructed by my CMDR, with a toothbrush, my toothbrush. I'd been down there full time for about seven weeks coming up for food and new Oxy masks when it happened.

I'd lost track of where I was cause it was so dark and I couldn't see very well cause of the frost on my goggles then I must've slipped on the wet floor or something cause I put my hand out and fell against this weird looking cylinder, just leant up in one corner.

Well, it lit up, and and it made this humming noise and and and I kind of, backed up and just stared at it I guess, well I didn't know what it was or like maybe if it was going to blow up or what. And then it opened and this guy came out of it.

He was all like covered in ice and stuff and he didn't look good but he was wearing a TC uniform with a CM badge so I guessed y'know he must be OK.. right? so he points at me like something out of a horror holo and he says 'You! What year is it?' I..I I tried to tell him but I just couldn't get the words out y'know through my Oxy mask and cause of the shivering and stuff and then he says 'where's Tiger?'

I said 'he's in Shield's quarters.. uh, sir' and he was like..
'Is he alive?' and I said that he was and then he said 'what about Powerslave? and Bubba? and Mell?' I said they were all around but AD Mell had retired, he asked about Jaruus who's just gone to the Phoenix and a couple of other people I've never heard of and then he said 'What about Mosh, is he still alive?' I said yes and he kind of groaned and looked annoyed. Then he just stepped back into that cylinder thing and I think he pressed some buttons and it all went dark again.

I think I'd like to request a transfer off this ship now..

End Transmission



Col. Steve the Cricket Bat
c/o LC Mosh

ACTIVITY
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92 mission(s) flown
15 High Scores - !!!!!!!
2 IWAT(S) passed
3 WSR's issued
1 Competitions Processed

In all my months as WC, I have never seen such high quality flying in a single week. Good job Hammer! There will be some extra medals forthcomming, when OPS gets around to approving them :P As to Shield, I know you're getting comfy with your new CMDR, but I expect great things... Crossbow too :P Let's show our new COM how great a Wing we really are!

POSTINGS AND PROMOTIONS
------------------------------------------
RA La'an to Shield CMDR
LT Copperdog AWOL - :(


AWARDS
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Squadron of the Week: Hammer - 92 missions flown, 15 HS's!!!!
Pilot of the Week: LCM Fahrer, with LC Mosh as a close second
None yet *coughLAZYOPSOFFICEcough*

COMPETITIONS
------------------------
RANT COMP - see above
Roulet Comp - See above
Hammer Squadron Trivia/Landmarks - Talk to Moshy



STANDING ORDERS
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-ALL MEMBERS-

Contact
All members are expected to remain active. Firstly, all members of the Wing will make contact with their direct superior whenever possible. However, a period of longer than a fortnight without contact and a declared LoA will result in the start of the AWOL timer. A further 3 weeks without contact will lead to transfer to the RSV’s. All such contact must be made by e-mail, to allow easy tracking of contact. This is the very bare minimum to be considered active in Wing IX. This contact should be made regardless of whether a pilot flies every day, or merely checks his/her e-mails every week



If you intend to be off of the internet for more then (5) days, email your Commander and let him or her know as a common courtesy. If you are taking a Leave of Abscense more then ten (10) days, notify your Commander -AND- the Wing Commander via email.



Activity

I view activity as essential to the continued wellbeing of this ship, and a requirement of every one of you. Forms of official activity are listed below.



Flying – This is an XWA Vessel, but all platforms constitute flight activity

MP – Freeworlds, and other MP Platforms will be recognised as long as evidence is provided

MB – All posts count as activity, as long as they are made on official EH boards

E-Mail – Contact with CMDR’s on a daily-fortnightly basis is a prerequisite, and the minimum activity required

Uniform Update – Not frequent, but clearly shows a pilot has been active in editing their uniform

Competitions – Expected from every pilot, participation in competitions is essential

IRC/MSN – Counts as contact with CMDR and upwards

IWATS – Obviously activity

Miscellaneous – Graphics, fictions, newsletter submissions etc. All count as activity



All these cover a wide range of activities, each with its own time and skill requirements. However, they all count toward activity – the more of these you are involved in, the more active you are – reflected in MSE’s and the continued existence of the ISD Relentless.


-SQUADRON COMMANDERS-

Weekly Squadron Reports (WSRs)
WSEs will be submitted NLT 12.00PM each Thursday by email to the Wing Commander, Your Squadron, and the Wing IX Email List. Also, each report must contain statistics for Total missions flown, and IWATS passed. Late reports with no viable excuse are not acceptable. If this is repeated 2 weeks in a row, a formal reprimand will be publicly given. A third or fourth week with late reports, or no report being made, without reason, will result in a CMDR losing his position.

Monthly Squadron Evaluations (MSEs)
MSEs will be submitted to the Wing Commander at any point in the last 3 days of the month. It should cover activity throughout the whole month, to the previous MSE.

AWOLs / MIAs / Reserve Requests
If you have found a pilot to be AWOL (no contact in 30 days), or MIA (bad email address), or a pilot has requested to go the reserves, you WILL NOT make the database request yourself. Forward the relevant information to the Wing Commander, who will verify the information, and make one last effort to 'save' the pilot before he or she is removed from the wing. This is NOT to take authority away from the CMDRs, but to allow the flags to ensure that a pilot really wants to leave. A good example is a pilot whos pissed off at his CMDR and has requested the reserves, when it's entirely possible the pilot would be happy in another squadron.

Flight Leaders
EVERY Flight Leader position in the Wing will ALWAYS be filled. If your Flight Leader leaves the squadron for whatever reason, you will appoint a new Flight Leader immediately. The Flight Office requires that all three flights have a leader in order for new pilots to be placed in that Squadron. We will not miss any opportunity for new pilots!

Designated XO
Every Squadron will have a designated XO. This person will know what he or she needs to do in the event that you are unable to come online, specifically in the area of filing a report for you. This is now a requirement aboard the Rel, and i expect XO’s to fill in as required without prompting from the WC or myself.




QUOTE OF THE WEEK
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[22:40] LC_Rejili- when's the last time aveneger won anything :P
[22:40] Hero|Radio - uh... last month
[22:40] Hero|Radio - ASF SC
[22:40] LC_Rejili - pft
[22:40] LC_Rejili - yeah right
[22:40] Hero|Radio - I had to award 5 SS and 2 BS with 3 PCs to 10 ppls in the squad :P
[22:41] LC_Rejili - I could melt down all my SS's into a giant statue of Frodo :P
[22:41] LC_Rejili - well, actually...
[22:41] Hero|Radio - frodo isn't really big
[22:41] Hero|Radio - 2 SS?
[22:41] LC_Rejili - or 0 :P
[22:41] Hero|Radio - both TAC medals?
[22:42] Hero|Radio - lol



In service of the Empire,

Lieutenant Colonel Rejili Holthaus
NHolthaus@Hotmail.com - "Baron de Menari"
WC/LC Rejili Holthaus/Wing IX/ISD Relentless
PCx4/ISMx3/MoI/MoT-1gh/IS-2BR-2SR-1GR/CoL/CoB/LoA/OV-4E [KNGT]
{IWATS-AIM-BOT-CBX-CSS-FZ-GFX-IBX-ICQ-IIC/1/2/3-JS-LIN-M/1/2-MP-MS-RT-SM/2/3-SWGB-TLN-TM/1-TT-VBS-WM-WPN-XAM}