Theta Squadron WSR #2
092245ZAPR14

A slower week largely due to my own preoccupation in RL, apparently buying a house is both expensive and time consuming. I often think back to the teenage me, or even the ten years ago me, and wonder what I'd make of myself now - if I'm honest I'd probably find the entire situation hilarious, as opposed to soul destroying... But enough of such trivialities, welcome to the 2nd Theta report, covering a little over a week since my last WSR. MSE awards are pending, so we can look forward to them in the next couple of days. So far April has been a little quieter, but I can detect a gradual build up of activity and interest. I'm happy to note the use of the new squadron MB, at present 4 of us have engaged in the ongoing squad run-on and it would be great to build the identity of each pilot as well as the wider squadron. I know the MBs are rather old and outmoded and some users experience difficulties logging on, however its a simple form of activity that doesn't take an eternity. I still have COMM-level access for unknown reasons so if there are problems using them, please just drop me a line and I'll do what I can to find a solution. Failing that I'll beg a favour from Raps...

Operating Thetan concluded its 1st week a few days ago, so well done to GN Yoda and CPT Flelm on claiming its first incarnation, likewise Rogues Gallery earned a number of submissions. Having only recently accepted the encroach of the 21st century I was not aware of search engines such as TinEye that allow for the rapid identification of images - to that end this weeks round will be delayed until tomorrow while I attempt to out-think the internet...

Flight activity is continuing to trickle in, including even the dreaded XW - for those unaware of the BSF process a manual screenshot must be made of the battle summary and forwarded on to the TAC, it truly is that old-school...

We retain a single vacancy within the squad so please do attempt to speak to any vets or similar you're still in contact with, it would be great to see a full squad, however briefly!

SO far in the Rogues Gallery - 4 submissions, so not too bad, with Mell getting in first. Current standings are Mell - 9, Yoda - 8, Torres - 8, Flelm - 6. The four pictures in last weeks gallery were 1) Wedge Antilles - Dennis Lawson, 2) Major Derlin - John Ratzenberger, 3) Padme Amidala - Natalie Portman, 4) Dorme - Rose Byrne.

Prima Inter Pares

Jointly held by our Operating Thetans this week, congrats to CPT Flelm and GN Pickled Yoda! Hopefully as and when I understand Scientology my puns will become less obvious, or worse vaguely relevant...

Current Squadron Status

1-1 - COL La'an - IRC/Mail activity, CMDR Duties, WSR, 10x LoC (SC), IS-SW Awarded (2nd place MP Ace March), Updated Uniform, MB Runon Post
1-2 - LCM Keth Aalith - Mail activity
1-3 - CPT Flelm - Mail Activity, 7x LoC (SC), IS-BW Awarded for Operating Thetan MP, RG Submission, MB Runon Post
1-4 - Vacant
2-1 - COL Mell Kerrigan - IRC/Mail activity, XO Duties, 2x LoC (SC), MB Runon Post
2-2 - COL Mark Schueler – IRC/Mail activity, Working on MUD
2-3 - COL Horus Blackheart - IRC/Mail activity
2-4 - COL Torres - Mail Activity, 6x SP Missions Flown, RG Submission
3-1 - GN Gilad Pelleaon - IRC/Mail activity, Updated Uniform
3-2 - MAJ Nebular - Mail activity
3-3 - COL Handril Madon - Mail activity, MUD Compilation
3-4 - GN Pickled Yoda - Mail activity, 31x SP Missions Flown, 1x LoC (SC), Awarded IS-GW SP Ace March/IS-BW Awarded for Operating Thetan SP, RG Submission, MB Runon Post

Current Fleet Competitions

All current comps are listed @http://tc.emperorshammer.org/competitions.php?id=current

Theta Competitions

As above, Operating Thetan MP/SP are running, as well as the Rogues Gallery, the trivia that will follow this report, albeit later than expected due to the ongoing war with Skynet... TinEye... whatever. All comps will run on a weekly basis and be reviewed at the end of 2014. I'm always open to further addition or suggestion, open door policy remains...

Operational Picture

...Whhherresss mah thingy, you know, the wet thing in the um, see through thing... yeah the glasss, that thing, where's the stuff that goes in ittt. S'got a Twi'lek on the laba...labo... s'got a Twi'lek on the picture bit. What's it called...ugh? Waddya mean you're closed, its only 5 in the eeevning, oh wait, ha 5 in the mornin... sure there was sumfing I had to do today... nah…

(Theta Pilot, pre-flight checks, ISD Warrior)

...So if we're commanded by a High Admiral, and they've got a High Admiral onboard, which is highest? Do they flip a coin, do they switch every few days, like... does one cover the other's holidays, like a timeshare right... must be, typical bloody Flag Officers with their timeshares, probably a swanky villa or estate somewhere nice, real air, real ale, real... drifted off for a second there, what were we talking about? And why is there always a mouse droid following the TCCOM? Has anyone else noticed that? Been following him about ever since I saw him ditching that protocol droid in his old uniform into the trash compactor on the command deck?...

(Maintenance Chief, ISD Warrior)

...Scan the defences, scan the defences... No defences detected, resuming primary programming... Subject located, ident confirmed, Bonini, D, High Admiral. Commencing tracking log, audio receiver live, transmission circuit engaged. Subject commencing briefing with subject 2, ident confirmed, Styles, Z K, Rear Admiral. Danger, danger BOTini detected, commencing evasive manoeuvres ...

(---CLASSIFIED SOURCE---, ISD Hammer)

CMDR's Corner

A steady trickle of activity on most fronts, and just about clinging on to communications with you all, even you Nebs! I'm keen to ensure that there's enough opportunity to attract, so as it stands we're looking at SC, the MUD, a run-on, trivia, and general mailing in addition to the traditional platforms. If anything has been missed or could be tried then the Theta group is there to be used - don't spare it on our account! Hopefully my own activity will pick up next week, although my MP opportunity will be limited I look forward to flying with you.

In the memory of the original BOTini, we can only hope his mechanical soul found the peace his utterly crushed and now recycled body never did,

Yours aye,

CMDR/COL Jarek La'an/Theta/Wing II/ISDII Warrior
GOE/GSx4/SSx3/BSx7/PCx7/ISMx10/IS-4GW-6SW-8BW-1PR-9GR-14SR-25BR/MoI/LoC-RS-IS-CSx8-Rx3/
MoC-1doc-1poc-2goc-3soc-15boc/CoLx7/CoB/LoAx5/OV-10E [DCRN] [Ace 4th] {IWATS-AIM-BFM-
CBX-FLA-HIST-ICQ-MCBS-MP/1-SM/3-SWGB-TLN-TM/2-TT-WM-WPN-XAM-XTT}